Lifestyles of a Germ

By: JOSH WATKINSON

"Hey! What’s up?" I am Bobby D. Germ. Now one time I was just sitting on a chair minding my own business and this overweight guy comes down and sits on me. I notice he’s smoking a cigarette and then I see this cut on his arm. I’m like "come on man - " then I thought of something. If I go in this guy’s body then I make him sick I might be satisfied. Following my germ-like instinct, I casually hopped in.

So there I am in the body just boppin around. Then these guys that are white and have badges popped out of nowhere, say "Surrender now or we’ll shoot!" Not thinking of what they would do to me, I walked by. Suddenly, three anti-virus bullets shot past me followed by ruby-colored sparks. Then they started chasing me. Again, following my germ-like instincts, I hid behind this pulsating bloody sack-like blob and began to realize my appetite grew larger after the excitement of the chase. Then I wasn’t thinking and I…sort of…well….ok. I confess! I drank the blood! My sharp fangs sinking into the heart, splashing blood everywhere. (Sob, sniffle, sniffle,….I’m ok)

At this point you’re probably wondering what I look like. I’m one millionth of a centimeter and one millionth of an ounce. I’m microscopic which allows me to enter the human body undetected. Stealth-like. If you begin to have the following symptoms, you can bet that Bobby D. Germ is "in the house": chest pain, tiredness, shortness of breath, dizziness.

See, I’m used to describing myself because the white blood cells…..well don’t tell my mom, but, I always describe myself during roll call at the Germcinatti Psychotic Prison for Cardio Infiltrators.

Well, I’ve gotta go. I’m more than half way through the prison bars and the guys with badges are in pursuit.

My Germ

By BRETT LANCASTER

Yo dude! My name is Wave. Let me tell you about my far out adventure last week. I was like on a rock and I was like waiting for my next person to attack. I’m always looking for cuts and stuff like that. And like…hey there’s a person coming. I slid to the person’s foot looking for a cut. I’m so small you can’t see or feel me. I finally found a cut on the person’s arm. Next I crawled into the cut.

Dude, it’s like a city in there. Blood rushing everywhere and red blood cells (they’re really tasty) and white blo… "WHITE BLOOD CELLS!" I said to myself, because I don’t want to, like, make a big commotion. So I just swayed with the red blood cells. Then I got really thirsty and decided to go to the heart.

By the way, I like to drink blood. No dude, I’m not a vampire. Well anyway, I was on my way to the heart. I passed a lot of red blood cells and I got like really hungry. Then I decided to eat about two or three red blood cells. When I got to the heart I jumped on a vein and started to suck some blood. When I suck blood the person starts to feel pain in the heart.

All of a sudden, I saw, like 20 white blood cells. I cut all of them in half. They didn’t have a chance to attack I continued to suck on the vein.

After I ate some red blood cells I got bored so I decided to kill the dude. I kill people by cutting right through the artery.

Two minutes later I got through the artery. I tingle with excitement as I watched the blood pour from the heart. As the blood drains, the heart gets smaller and smaller until it looks like an old banana.

Now, I am the most feared germ in the world. All doctors are trying to find a cure for me..but that’s impossible! Ha Ha Ha Ha Haaaa! I’m invisible!

A Germ with Attitude

By Alexandra Tait

Hey, my name is Bad Stacy and I’m bad, I mean really bad. It was a sunny day and I was at a soccer game. There was this girl and she sneezed right on a water bottle, gross!

Anyway, some girl named Becca came by and took a sip of the water bottle that the other girl sneezed on, double yuck! Before you could say "jack-pot" I was on that water bottle quicker than a cute little bunny!

Perfect, she drank from the water bottle with me on it. Now I was sliding down the tongue. Plop! I was now in the stomach.

Immediately I was facing hundreds of white blood cells. Ahha! This was my chance. I quickly took out my purse and got my lipstick out. I pressed a button and pink lipstick hit the white blood cells and they all died. I guess being a girly girl germ comes in handy when you have Tango Mango lipstick.

Finally, I reached the eardrum. You see this is not goal or anything but I like to warm up with it. Next, I dug my purple flower long nails into the eardrum. Then I screamed, "I am Bad Stacey!" Quickly I added, "I can’t help the looks, ok?" In return I heard a cry for help. "The party has just begun, Becca, the party has just begun," I said.

Swiftly, I was headed towards the brain. When I finally reached it, it looked like I was out of luck. There, right before my eyes, millions of white blood cells popped out from behind the brain. I checked in my purse but my Tango Mango lipstick was gone! "Oh no, I thought, it must have fallen out!" Yup, it looked like luck just wasn’t with me.

Thinking quickly, I knew I had to do something or I’d be dead. So I raced past the brain and zoomed through the nostrils. And when I hit the floor, there before my eyes was a girl coughing on a water bottle. Looks like I’ll give it another shot.